Mike Gold had pretty much managed to talk London Transport Advertising into giving us their account. He just had to take the client to lunch to finalise the details. He said it would help if we could convince him of our design credentials.

Well one of the partners in our agency was Gordon Smith. Gordon was a terrific art director. So Goldie said Gordon should come along at the end of the meal for coffee, to meet the client. So that’s what happened: Goldie and the client had a great lunch, everything was sorted. Then, just as they were drinking coffee Gordon walked in.

The client looked up, saw Gordon, and said, “You?” Gordon looked at the client and said, “You?” And the client got up and stormed out. Goldie was gobsmacked, he said, “What happened there?” Gordon said, “You didn’t tell me he was the client.”Goldie said, “Did you know him?” Gordon said, “Yes, he used to be an account man at Vernons when I was an art director there.” Goldie said, “What happened?” Gordon said, “Well we had a disagreement, and the last time I saw him I left him unconscious in a skip on Great Portland Street.”

So that was the end of the London Transport Advertising account. Sometimes pitches are like that, unpredictable. One time we pitched for Hawaiian Tropic suntan lotion. We did some really nice double-page spread press ads. We were really pleased with the campaign. Mike Gold said, “You can’t show that, I’ve just done the media plan and it’s 48 sheet posters.”

I said, “You never told us.” Goldie said, “Well I’m telling you now, it’s posters. You’ll have to redo the creative work.” I said, “I’m telling you it’s press. You redo the media plan.”

But of course, he didn’t and I didn’t. So at the pitch we all presented our work to the client. The client said, “You’ve just shown me press ads, but the media plan is posters.” I said, “We know. Creative and Media couldn’t agree.”

So that was the end of the Hawaiian Tropic account. But one of the most creative pitches we did, didn’t involve creative work at all. Mike Greenlees was pitching for Polyfilla, the DIY account. Pollyfilla comes in a tub and it’s for repairing cracks and holes in walls. Mike wanted to brief us on creative work for the pitch. I said we’d just done seven pitches and lost them all with creative work. The way we were doing pitches, by showing creative work, wasn’t working.

Maybe it was time to try something different. He asked what I meant. I said, “I think we should do a creative pitch. But without ads, with some pitch theatre instead.” Mike said that wasn’t how we did it. I said, “Well I’m not doing any ads, so we’ll have to.” We had a huge row about it and Mike was so angry he kicked a hole in the wall. Then, on the day of the pitch he got a tub of Polyfilla and a trowel.

He said to the clients, “The problem with your current advertising is it makes everything look too easy. This makes Polyfilla look like it’s not for serious jobs.” Then he got the trowel and started to put the Pollyfilla in the hole in the boardroom wall. It fell out. Mike said, “Look, that’s what happens in the real world.”

He put it back in again. It fell out again. Mike said, “See, it’s not easy.” He put it back in again. It fell out again. Mike said, “It takes practice to get it right.” This time it stayed in. He smoothed it off. It looked like a good, professional job, and the clients applauded. Mike had proved to them that we were an agency that understood DIY.
The clients left, very impressed. Then, as they shut the door, the Pollyfilla fell out of the wall again. It ruined the boardroom carpet.

But, by that time, Mike had already got the account. Which proves you need a creative pitch to win an account. You don’t always need creative work.